Being Practical

I'm a very practical person.

The more I think about it, the more I know it's true..

The more I go through obstacles throughout my life, the more I know how practical I am..

And somehow, I ended up..

InsyaAllah,

Spending my whole life with my dear husband, who is very practical as well..

Our practicality just attracts one another, I guess

Hopefully, it means we're meant to be with each other...Amin

I've been dating him for 6 years before we got married..

Through those years, when most of people sometimes want their couple to be more romantic, more sensitive, and all..

I don't feel the need for that..

And he doesn't have a single romantic nor sensitive bone in his body..

And I'm good with that

I'm really comfortable with the way things have been going..

Still am.. and hope will always be..

Sometimes, I even get a bit annoyed when he does something merely romantic..

Now, after being married for more than 12 years..

The practicality really works well in the household..

He really get things done..

We do quite good in sharing errands, sharing on taking care of the kids, sharing on having our each own me time..

And the best thing is, most of the time, I don't have to say a single thing, or at least I don't have to say it to his face..

The most common thing that I'd do is..I mumble by myself about stuffs..

And he knows..he gets the hints..

But we ladies, have always have our sensitive moments, don't we

And it just gets me at the heart..

every time he does or says things..

That, maybe, he doesn't realize at all

That, maybe, he does them just for practicality sake..

But he just did or said the right thing at the right time..

And maybe for others it's nothing..

For me, knowing him as this practical person that he is, means a whole lot..

These are some of my favorites..

Going out with 4 kids, 11-7-5s..takes out all off the energy of my 36 years of mommy age..

I'd be exhausted every time I arrived home..

The minute we entered the house, he'd be taking all the kids upstairs to their room..

And leave me taking my time to relax by myself downstairs..

That means the world to me..

When my kids get sick.

Usually, I'll do all the taking care of them..

Which I don't mind at all..

But, every now and then I have the time between all those taking care off stuffs..

He'll just go over me, says nothing and gives me like a really serious massage from head to toe..

That feels heavenly..

When we go together out on a shopping purpose..

I don't get the time to go to places I really want to..

I've got 4 boys plus one..

So, boys places and shops are the places that we go to..

I really don't mind anyway..

I prefer to do my shopping by myself, alone..

when the kids are at school and my hubby is at the office.

I do it peacefully, without any rush from them..

But every now and then,

I notice he often disappears

Usually when the kids are taking a break at the end of our shopping time, eating donuts, having drinks, or others..

And he'll just show up, carrying a shopping bag, which can be anything..

A dress, shoes, a book,..anything..

And he really knows my taste, besides off his good taste on stuffs as well..

How nice is that..

And every now and then..

He just says the nicest thing..

One time, we were talking about every day stuffs..

Kids, house, friends, work..

We share opinions on everything..

we have good discussions..which means debating on stuff..

Which is fun..

So, one time, at the end of a discussion, I concluded..

Well, maybe it's just not meant to be then..Just accept it..

It was like one out of hundreds of our usual discussion..

But he commented,

How lucky I am to have a wife that's understanding..

Isn't that sweet..

The latest one was this..

It was the twins birthday party..

When it was quiz time, the MC threw a question to the guests..

How much does the twins mommy's weigh..

A very rude question, isn't it..

But every one was having fun with answering silly answers..

When it was time for me to give the right answer, I rejected to answer..

So, the MC went to my husband for the answer..

He answered a silly answer as well,

She only weighs 25 kgs, the rest is inner beauty..

If that's not the sweetest thing a husband can ever say..

Hahahaha..

Love you with all my heart..

Just the way you are..

Happily Married..

Being married..

Almost 12 years now..*hopefully getting stronger each and everytime..*

and had been going out with him since 6 years before

Baby steps..if you're looking it from my parents', most of my aunts' and uncles', or my parents in law's point of view..

My respect for all of them..

Have been learning a lot from them..

Still am..

I can't say that I'm not the optimisstic type..

I just think myself as the realistic type..

I don't buy the princess who mets the prince and live happily ever after stuff..

That's kids' dream..

where everything has to have a happy ending..

In real life? You have to work for it..

It needs effort to get happiness..

and, it doesn't always ends happy..

But that's the art of it..

It's impossible to be happy all the time..

It won't be a special feeling anymore then..

Me, myself feel the happiest..after all the ups and downs, all the bumpy paths, rain, wether its a drizzle or storm, that I've got to get through..and it comes to a stop..

doesn't matter if the result is bad or good..

as long as you know that you have done your best,

that you have done everything that you can possibly do..

so, you don't look back in regrets..

that's what matters the most..

That's true happiness..

If it ended well, Thank God..

If it doesn't, Maybe it's not the end yet..continue trying, don't give up..

Just stay in God's path and believe in It..

You've been experiencing that all your life, haven't you?..

Well, don't you expect it to change to a different way when you get married..

Your spouse is one of the first new important aspect in your married life

So, he will also brings all the colors in your life now..bright and not so bright ones..

Not to mention, all the we-thought-small-stuffs that comes along with the fact that you're being married..

I know mine for 7 years, before we got married..

Of course, having to know him for 7 years in advance has it benefits..

For me, it definitely gives a whole lot information about him..attitudes, behaviour, habits..

I had never planned to change those..

as I said it before, it's just information..

IMHO, people can't change, they just compromise, they adapt, they tolerate..

and the older they get, with more experience in their life, they'll get wiser..

and hopefully they're able to compromise more, they're more adaptable, more tolerable..

but never change..

so, the moment I decided that he's the one that I'm going to spend my whole life with..

that's the moment I was willing to accept him, all the good and especially all the bad..

But still, everytime I thought I know everything about him *come on..7 years!!*,

he'll 'surprise' me.. in good ways..and not so good ones

Up until now..

OK.. So, hmm..actually what do you get from being married?

For me.. You'll get someone you can rely on, depend on..

You'll get someone you can share your thoughts to, someone who stands by you, someone who trusts you..

You'll get someone who loves you..

Even though sometime, he doesn't show it..

but you know, just by being there.. being responsible.. spending his whole life with you

and eventually..

You'll get your children..

they're the jewels in your life..

the ones responsible for you not falling apart in life..

the essence of your life..

You'll do everthing for them..

You're estatic when they're happy..

You're devastated when they're sad..

the best thing that ever happened in your life..

the reason that you're here..

So, don't sweat on the small unhappy parts..

concentrate on all the happy stuff..no matter how small it is..

Be greatfull, thankfull for all the simplest joy in life..

You'll live to be the happiest person in life..

My 'Memories' of Her..

Maybe I was 2..
when she passed away..
I really don't remember..
at all..

No memories of her..
Not the way she looks..
Not the way she talks..
Not the way she walks..
Nothing..
at all..

I always build up my own imagination of her..
Trying to put every pieces together..

Everyone who knows her tells me...
I resemblance her.. exactly
Ok...she's pretty then...^_^

She's got 3 sisters...
My aunts..love them dearly..
They all have this resemblance to one another..
I picture her...
talking like them..
walking like them..
Ok..she's cool then..

There are 5 brothers of hers..
My uncles...respect them truly..
They're all kind..
They're all 'crazy'..
I picture her..
acting like them..
laughing like them..
Ok..she's fun then..

So..
I had this pretty, cool, fun mom
who passed away when I was 2..
who I don't have any memories of..
that I practically don't know anything about..

But, why..
every time people talk about her..
every time I go to her grave..
every time someone I just know ask about her..
..my voice starts trembling

Why..
on my graduation day..
on my umroh days..
on my wedding day..
every time I give birth to my sons
every time every each of my kids turns 2..
even now..
..tears are in my eyes

Why..
when my first son reminds me to pray..
when my second son says a prayer for mommies..
when the twins sing a song for mommies..
..something hurts deep in my heart

All the big moments..
until all the small stuffs..
Really don't know why...

I think..
having no memories of her..
is the thing that make me feels this way...

Ibu..
Wish I had known u...
My prayers are always with u..
Looking forward to see u in heaven...^_^

mia, 2009

How to Know When You're In Love

Over a year ago.. I've started working again
Not surprisingly..I'm one of the oldest there..
But, I fitted nicely

Ever since..
When it's break time
Hanging out with my young colleagues..
I feel I'm back in High School
All the stories about
dating, breaking up, fighting...
Exhausting..

From the not-too young ones..
It's about
Getting married..
How do you know that s/he's the one..
How do you know that you're in love..

But then..I don't talk that much
About Love..
Because..when it comes to love..
You'll just know it when it comes..
and it's different for everyone..

For Me..
When you're willing to sacrifice
Whatever the consequences will be
That's when you know
You're In Love

When you're willing
to do whatever that have to be done
Putting aside all your principals
That's when you know
You're In Love

When you spend your time
At many places
With many people
You still feel relieve
Going back to him
That's when you know
You're In Love

When you don't have to say it all the time
Your gestures..just says everything
That's when you know
You're In Love

Whatever your feelings are..
Whatever mood your in..
Happy..Sad..
Confused..Proud..
He's the first one
You trust your story with..
That's when you know
You're In Love

When you don't try to change someone
But accepting him the way he is..
That's when you know
You're In Love

When you believe in someone
More than you believe in yourself
That's when you know
You're In Love

When you know
That he's not someone you can live with..
But..
He's someone you can't live without..
That's when you know
You're In Love

The list goes on and on..
and on..
and on...
endless..

So..
For the one I'm In Love with...
Thanks for being the one
It was 17 years ago
the first time I fell In Love with you
And it's still growing stronger
and stronger..

For my dear friends..
The ones that make me think about Love..
Just want to share my point of view
For some of you..Hope you've found it
For the others..Hope you'll find it
The one you're In Love with..

mia, june 2009