My Analysis

I always see it as "analyzing people"

And when I say "people", it means almost everyone..

From a member of a family, an old friend or acquaintances, until someone that I just knew for quite some time, or briefly, even someone that's hanging around just long enough to be analyzed.

But off course the people who are being "analyzed" look at it differently..

Some of them don't care, some don't realize it, but most of them.. get annoyed.. :P

People will see it as being nosy,  

But then, I think there's a big difference between nosy and what I'm doing..

I do it unpretentiously..without any reason at all..

I just find it amazing how different people are..what kind of characteristics that they have, and with their characteristics facing the problems and come up with different solutions for them..

I do this to my family all the time, since forever..
Back when I was still in school,
My objects are my friends, my fellow students and teachers/lecturers..
When I got married,
They are my husband, my new family, my kids..
At the place I work..
Off course, my boss, my colleagues, the clients..

And lately, as a teacher and lecturer, my favorite objects of analyzing are..
You've probably guessed it..My Students!!

It's different though when I analyzed them..
If before I do it unpretentiously,
Now, it's somehow useful because their characteristic really shows up in their work,
How they do their work, how they face and solve problems..
So, it's an advantage to have known them better when 'teaching' them..

Some of the first students that come to my attention are off course the ones with issues..
Them who come late so many times or miss a lot of meetings, always late on submission and come up with poor result..the ones with minimum effort..
Usually, in the beginning I would listen on how their friends think of them..
Have they got problems outside school, with their family, their health, their love life..
Then, when they're around, I would start analyzing..
Some of them, really got potential to be better or even great..
But are just not motivated enough or mistakenly motivated..
Being their lecturer and old enough, I always think that they're repairable..they're all still so young..

On the way, during all the teaching process, I'll get interested in the ones who are in class physically but their mind is wandering everywhere but in class..
Some of them, just needed a wake up call..to be reminded of the reason they're doing what they're doing and the consequences of their action..

The ones that sometimes slip away are the ones that are really good in the beginning and the process,
but then when it comes to the end merely survived..or worst, doesn't survived..
These cases are such a pity..they've been doing so well and getting so close..
These, usually, are technical..managing, prioritizing..

But when I say everyone is under my radar..I mean everyone, each and every one of them..
Even the good ones and the best one..
Curious on how they did it..what did they have to 'sacrifice', what motivated them to have pushed it to that point..

Each and every case then become a lesson for everyone..
To know and understand themselves better..
To do better in the future..
Me, included..

I'm loving it..

This term I was handed-over classes that at first I thought wasn't my thing.

Construction. Seriously?..

Well, someone gotta get up there and do it..

And I guess, I kinda feel tickled of how some of the students are still clueless or aren't confident enough about those construction thingy..

After all, the lecturer before..my dear colleague whose having her maternal leave, is such a well prepared-well organized type of lecturer..

So when I started to take a quick look on the material.. I felt, it'll be OK!..hopefully..hahaha..

OK..OK.. so I have my doubts of myself in the beginning..

So, when the classes started..I prepared for the worst..

I'm just gonna go through the lecture and brief the assessments, as I am supposed to..

My plan was: make them understand and make them do the assessments. Nothing more..

So not-me at all, I sorta feel a bit pessimistic about whether the students gonna find this class interesting or dead boring..

The terms before, I had some of the interesting classes..

At least, I felt excited teaching them..so, it was a piece of cake making the students to feel the same thing..

Unlikely with Construction classes, when at times, me myself don't feel interested enough..and then I have to make the students understand in an interesting way?..hmmm..

But surprisingly..I owe it all to the students..

They're such an uplifting type of persons..

I just love it, when they ask, discuss, consult, and everything..

They're so interested in the lesson!!..Isn't that the most amazing feeling that a teacher can get from her students..

At times, I still don't have as big confident as I do, not teaching construction..

Those are the times when they're absent with no particular reason, or when one or two of them don't submit their assessment, or just a simple didn't do as they're expected on their process, or doing other stuff -either more important or more interesting- and not concentrating in class..

Those thing are such downers for me..

And I just can't shake it out of my head sometimes..and you just started thinking..I should've done something differently, I could've done it more interestingly, I would've done it from a more fun side..over and over..

But somehow, the uplifting moments are just so much more then the downers..

How they still ask of your opinion outside the class..

How they're willing to stretch the class finishing time just to understand more..

How they go through they're unnecessary overtime doing the assessment..

How they prioritize your class from others..

However rare those uplifting moments are,

Or however rather a small portion of students from the whole class do them..

They're still such a booster for me..soul, body, and mind!

Thanks for making the class a more fun place to be!

Nice to Meet You!

My first day as a lecturer..

Excited..big time

Nervous..a bit..

I was all well prepared with the material though..

So, I wasn't that worried with the lesson..

I'd managed..

The students were the ones that I couldn't predict yet..

And there they were, already inside the classroom..well, 3 out of 4 of them..All girls!

One of them sat on the first row, right in front of my desk..

Looked like she's in her full attention for a new lecturer, keeping her eyes on..Me!

The other two behind her..giving looks to each other and softly speaking, almost whispering, to each other..My thoughts then was, they're comparing opinions with each other..about Me!

I know!!..Come On!! How paranoid was I!!

I'm the type of person who can block my feelings whenever needed though..

OK.. Let's Just do this!

Though, I was feeling rather awkward, with a small number of students in a rather small class..Yet, we don't know a thing about each other..

So, I introduce myself and asked them to introduce to themselves..

I was all open, and talked about a brief of everything..

And they were all giving this short sentenced, almost sounded unwilling, information about themselves..

I forgot the exact moment, but then came the last student, a boy..late

So, We discussed about the attendance rules a bit because of that..

But he was definitely my fresh air for that morning..

He got into class, still all distracted and preoccupied about stuffs while apologizing of his lateness..and kept on blabbing..

Thank God! Someone was willingly having a natural conversation with me!

Then, being me, I open up my lecture by eliciting them..getting answers from them and putting down the answers on the board

Just to live up the class, and to know their knowledge..

'Front row' girl and the boy were the only one who showed interest..

By then, I labelled the girl as the serious one there..

Concentrating and so getting into the lesson..nodding her head, giving answers, asking questions, and all

I made them to do design exercises just to know their capability..

The process of the first exercise were all different..

'Whispering' girls were doing it insincerely..looked like it..

'Serious' girl was all out..

And the boy was babbling along while doing his exercise..

Because the first exercise turned out good, I was tickled to do an extra exercise just right before I gave them the exact assessment..

When 'whispering' girls franticly talk to each other (a bar louder volume) and included 'serious' girl..

Then 'serious' girl as if she's the spokesperson of the girls asked me to skip it and go directly to the assessment..

By that, 'serious' girl turned into 'bossy' girl!!

Their label was stuck on them for almost the whole 4 first weeks..

Then gradually from there, they started to show their real skin..

After that came.. I know you and you know me, so what?..still keeping the distance

Then came..I want to know you better..opening up..

And so on..

And as they say, the rest is history!

Now, I would say, we're at the point of ..I know you so well!!..appreciating and respecting each other..

There are no more..Whispering girls, front row/serious/bossy girl, the boy..

they became:

'Laid back-most of the time clueless or late on information-super talented/black box' girl..

'Simple-know what she wants-consistent' girl..

'Well organized-open for critics-super confident' girl..

'Humble or Arrogant/confused-speak up his opinion-practical' boy..

OK! Wrapping it up, guys..

What else can I say..They're Great!

Take a bow, y'all..

Special Ones..

I try my best not to play favorites on people..

As a mom, I don't have a favorite kid..

As a teacher and lecturer, I don't have a favorite student..

It doesn't mean that there are no one special..

It somehow means the opposite..every each and one of them are special..

That sounded so cliche, so corny, so cheesy..hahaha..ok! got it!

yet that's the truth!

I spend my forever with my kids..

Special moments with special feelings happens now and then..

No timing at all..

No matter how small or big the moments are..

No matter how often or rarely it happens..

When it happens, it just does

Whether you're prepared for it or not..

and I'm the type of person that doesn't look at a special moment to have to be a good moment

Bad moments, are also special moments..

All of those moments shows process..learning process, growing process..

And each of those moments, strengthen their personality and reminds you how special they are..

It's a bit hard when you're dealing with course's students..

You meet them on such brief of moment..

You gotta catch the moment right away..

The longer you've been teaching, the more you're experienced to getting to know these kids..

And it's amazing, how most of these kids are so open to you..

Trust you with things, not holding back..

Well, the younger are more trusting then others..

Preteens and teenagers are a bit tricky..

Yet in my (old) age with a preteen home myself, I have tricks of my own..

My college students are different stories..

You also got to deal them right away, with their work..

But as they've reached that certain age, as an adult, they keep their distance..

The first few meetings when you first know them, you'll get the first impression of them..

I try not to put a label right away..

You've gotta earn their trust in the process..

The learning process then is the moment that you'll get to know them the best..

By then, I am forced to put label on them..

At this point, some people see it as playing favorite..

But in fact, it shows you and also pointing out to them how special they are

and with doing that, I know how to deal with each and every one of them..personality per personality!

They are different..and because of that, they have to be treated differently..

There are limitations..there are rules and requirements, there's also a standard achievement..

That's why I'm so into wanting to be involve in the process..

that's where all the hard work happens, make use of their weaknesses and strengthen their strong points..

and you can aim the result from there on..

Everyone's special..

In their own and special way..

It's a pleasure to have known and be a part of these special people..

My "Kids"

It started when I started working again..

And I'm working as a teacher,

The first time, with students from the age range of 6 years old up until teenagers.

Though I have kids with the same age range of some of them..

Still teaching your own kids and teaching other people's kids is a totally different..

My 4 boys are used to me..

They know me so well!!

I am, most of the time, a laid back person

Fun, kid around, silly..

They know when to fool around..

But I am also a strict freak on some things..

Being polite to people, respecting older people, saying the truth, responsibility..

So, they know when not to, and just do it!

They don't wanna mess up with Ibu!

The students..later, they'll know me too..

I'm not a faking type of person, that's nice in front of the students..but actually hate their guts..

It's too much of a hard work, keeping up to fake it up..

But I don't wanna scare them away from the beginning..

And I'm not scary..at all..

I just have my values..

I'm actually a bit loose with these guys..

I know how my kids are so loosen up when they're joining a course..

They don't take them as seriously as school..not at all..

I also know how kids nowadays are so swamp up with school..

And yet, they still have to go to courses afterwards..

So, learning in a fun way it is!

And, a fun teacher is how you get there..yeay!

I'm one of the game-y teacher..

The standard, is doing games on the beginning and end of the lesson..so 2 games per lesson..

My class has minimum 3 times games..and I rarely do the minimum..

If the class is to rowdy, I'll do fun projects!!

Usually I do projects that involves all the students to work together..

I try my best to be a fun teacher!

But, there are always somethings..

Things that annoys me the most are behavior..

The 'whatever' type..

The 'look at me' type..

On my good days, I'll ignore them..

But when it starts to effect the others who were paying attention to the class..

That's when it becomes bad..

No more Mrs. Nice Teacher..

I stop doing anything..no talking, no teaching, no nothing..and just stare at the person..

I use my deeper but louder tone of voice and call that person name..

I threw a white board eraser to the person once..

I cut their score if I have to..

But, that hardly ever happens..

At some point, they'll know me so well too!

I'm a very fun person if you don't mess around!

Then I started teaching college students..

It's a new story all over again..

Some of these guys are the most hardworking young people that I have ever met..

With all of their assessments and classes..with limited time, yet..seriously done, wanting to know more, doing their best..

Overtime, sleepless night, literary cut and blistered fingers,..

I appreciate them..

Even the weaker ones and the lazier ones, I encourage them the most..

And it is still a universal mystery of how the young minds work, I guess..

Because there are always cases,

when on one time someone that is so hardworking..suddenly lost interest or just broke down..

That's when I have to be seemed not panicking, calm..and try to approach them in the way that won't make them even going further away..

And talking to them, being a part of them and know their progress and problems, is my way to deal with it..

So, I'm thankful to have all of them as a part of my life now..

Giving all the colors in life..

Buzy bee..bzzzz..

Waaaa..I’ve been sooo busy these last couple of months..

Even for my standards, it was extravagant..
I had never done as many things going on at once as this before..
Not even in my younger times..
When I was in a better shape, stronger physic, more time to spend..
What got me started?..
The chance of opening an old but new thing to explore..
Yet, I won’t let go the things I’ve been doing before
What made me going?..
frankly speaking, mainly, the money..off course!
The fact that I’ve missed this part of my life for quite sometime now
Yet, to prove I can still be a good mom and still be professional in the work I’ve been doing and the one that I’m going to do..

From my point of view, I deserve all the break downs and the being hysterical parts..
Despite those, not too bad juggling results..

As I said, I was starting to get tired of being lacked of money on an earlier and earlier time of the month..lately
And it’s not going to the other way, if I didn’t do anything about it..
Working part time and doing lasagna’s order every now and then ain’t just enough..
But getting a new full time job has never been my favorite option..
I will never be ready to leave my kids full time..
And, although I’ve always believed in the power of positive thinking, what happened then were such answers for all my questions..
All of them happened at almost the same time..

My cousin needed an intensive private English lesson..
And when I say intensive, it means Monday to Thursday every night 1.5 hours each..
And on the last month, it was doubled the time..
Normally, I won’t take this..
I wouldn’t be able to meet my kids after works
But the thought of it only being for 2 months top..
And I was gonna teach my own cousin

And then, this one came..
The one that I didn’t dare to hope for but have been thinking about it the last couple of years..
I got accepted to be a lecturer in a design institute..
Though it hasn’t started yet,
The process which involves going back and forth there still took some of my time that was left..

And my regular every day - some people think I’ve got nothing to do at home - stuff..
The older ones were having their exam for going to the next grade in school…
Me, as a my-kids-are-having-the-exam-but-I’m-busier-preparing-than-they-are mom, was on my peak of being busy..
Not to mention, the twins got a fever during that time..
That really completed my not-busy life at home..

And off course..
My part time teaching..
Which has already taken half of my time everyday..

So,
That was it..
Even thinking back, I feel exhausted..
Hahaha..
But it felt nice collecting my blessings after being a busy bee..
The satisfying feeling,
The job well done,
The kids’ great scores at school, The kids’ health,
and I’m not pretending I don’t care..the money..of course! :D

Alhamdulillah!

Pieces of the Puzzle

It was less than 3 years ago

When I first found it..

Yet,
It has been a big part..
Doing it with all my heart..
Giving the energy I didn’t know exists..
Taking it seriously..

It has been an important part..
It feels completing..
Surprisingly able to be squeezed in..

All the ups and downs..
The work that have to be done..
The people that you work with..
And especially the people that you transferred your knowledge to..
I love teaching..
Love being a teacher..

And after 2 years doing it..
Routinely..
Professionally..
I started to get addicted..

By then,
I realized that this was one of my pieces of the puzzle..
That was once scattered all over..
And now starting to fall to their places..

And somehow..
Like it was just meant to be..
I found another teaching job that’s totally different from the one before..
A big challenge..
A big doubt in the beginning taking it..
Though I’ve only done it for such a short period of time..
It’s growing on me in high speed..
And it fits perfectly!
Falling in love with it..

Though it’s far from being finished..
I’m starting to see parts of it clearer..

Along the way..
I don’t always find the right pieces..
Or maybe, it was the right piece..
But I just didn’t put it in the right place..

So,
The pieces are there..
Waiting for you to find them..
And to put them in their right places..
You’ll find the pieces in your own time and place..
Don’t rush it..
Don’t give up..
Don’t stop believing..
You’re getting there!

*I hope my puzzle is a huge, enormously big, gigantic, humongous one..
And will be as beautiful as it possibly can be when it’s done..
Someday.. :) *

My New Joy in Life..

I met so many interesting people..

Despite all the trouble that comes along..

Actually, this thing is one of my Ups in teaching..

It happened as soon as the first day I taught..

The first day I taught..

There was this boy..

He's around 14 back then..

A very handsome young man..

And he stares at you, when you're teaching..

Hahaha..I felt a bit big-headed and sort of pedophillic up until the other teachers told me that he does that to everyone..including the male teacher..hahaha..

In my firsts younger classes,

On my first day, I made 3 students cry..

The first one, because he kept on losing his pencil..

The second one, because she was left behind when they were taking notes..

And the third one, because she lost the game and the other students were blaming her..

Hahaha..what a first day heh?

It's classic.. When you thought first day was bad..

It became worse.. Hahaha..

Well, not all of the time..

You get a mix of good days and bad..

That what makes teaching life colorful!!..to the max!!!

The students!!

All the different types of students..

From all the different age range..

From all the different backgrounds..

I love a semi-large class..

The right amount off students..

Yeah, it's the dream of every teacher..I think..

Too few students on one point could be boring..

Too many students could be uncontrollable..

But it all depends though..

On lots of things..

I feel challenged either when I get a small class or a large one..

Dealing with the amount of the students is one thing..

But dealing with special characters of students is something else..

When dealing with younger kids..

They really want to get your attention..

So, you'd better give your full attention first..

Rather than they start to do unimaginative stuffs to get your attention.. Hahaha..

They tend to touch, hug, and stuffs..

Sometimes it's adorable..

But sometimes it just becomes annoying.. Hahaha..

Especially, when they do it to get away with something..

Like unfinished work, or don't want to continue doing their work..

Yeah..yeah..nice try munchkins..

The pre-teens students are special as well..

Some of them really want to be treated as if they're not kids anymore..

They talk about their "girlfriend"..

They brag about their knowledge of bad words..

Or their courage to do bad things..

They seek attention by showing off their cool stuffs..

They underestimate the others who's younger then them..

Interesting phase..

For me, the teens are the most challenging ones..

We got to be more as their friend rather than being a teacher..

But you have to be cool enough for them to be considered as their friend..

Hahaha.. That's homework!

See!

That was only looking by their age differences..

When talking about different backgrounds..

And making them having different characters..

That's FUN!

There are the spoiled ones, the shy ones, the over confident ones, the attention seeker ones..

Countless..

And when you thought you've seen them all..

You'll be surprised! Every time..

FUN!!

Having a Blast..

A Piece of My Paradise On Earth

I've been longing for a proper kitchen set for a very long..long..time

This is my next room in the house that's out of the renovating touch..

And the thing is I'm a moody person when it comes to cooking..

When I don't feel like it, I don't cook at all..

But most of the time, I love cooking...

I love cooking so much,

I'd stock them!

Because I kept on cooking..and cooking..and cooking..

I would cook for breakfast, lunch, dinner..

and everything in between..brunch, snacks, supper..

Up until there's no more room for any food left..

so stocking it up will do..

When I'm in that mood..

Now, that is when I really long for a nice place to accommodate my mood..

hahaha..

Well, I do just fine with my existing kitchen though..

My kids and friends love my cooking..

But, I bet I'd do much more better if I did it in a kitchen that I've been longing for..

The style would be as simple as possible though..

But still, it would be a simple me!

A hint of ethnic..

A dash of bling..

Sassy!!

Let's go through this one by one..

or well at least..let's imagine this one by one..

Ok, Dreaming begin..

First thing first..The Counter top!

Granite would be out of my league..

Synthetic granite...could be a dream, hope it would come true..

But I have my heart on Solid Wood!!

So material wise, it's a combination of Wood and Natural Stone!!

So, what goes more perfectly with wood and stone than

White and Flowy..

Perfectly Natural..

It's so Obvious what I want!

Balinese style..

Everything from there is down hill..

Let it flow..

I love the idea of placing the food on ethnically dishes..

Potteries, bamboo plates, stone bowls..

And how everything in the dish use the natural herbs or ingredients to garnish them..

Sereh, banana leaves,..

And all the completion of the design would make it Amazing..

Dimmed lightings would be wonderful..

Uuuu..and Candle lights are delightful..

Some touches of greens would definitely make a statement of Bali..

and it's not Bali if there's no kamboja flower tree..

So, I can pull some plants in potteries here and there..

Let's get totally Balinese crazy..

and make space for some..

Balinese umbrellas?..

somewhere..

hahaha..maybe just a miniature of them?

Well, or maybe just a painting of them...

A girl can dream..can they..

Dreaming of Morocco

I've been dying to decorate my bedroom

I've lived in about 6 different bedrooms since ive got married

my bedroom is never a part of the house that's

prioritized to be decorated

its the last thinkable thing to do..

But not have been decorating it,

didn't mean I didn't think about it..

More than that,

Being so long..

The concept kept on changing..

and I've been collecting

many ideas for it

So, first

it was simple sweet classic

And then

Came the Indian concept

After that,

I went through a very long pause

of getting tired thinking that it's not going to happen soon..

But these last weeks,

I've fallen in love with..

Moroccan style..

I love all the elements..

I love the colorful stained glass

on windows..

on lanterns..

I adore the colorful mozaic ceramic tiles that are all over the places

on buildings; walls, floors, ceilings..

on potteries..

on tables..

on everything..

Despite all the lovely materials that is used..

I heart all the ornaments that's common in Moroccan style..

..the low height tables

the lanterns..

the potteries..

the rugs..

the cushions..

the dishes..

No to deny that they are amazingly colorful..

they feel so comfortably down to earth.

And the best,

In my opinion would be..

The lanterns..

Beautiful!!!

The overall look and atmosphere is PASSIONATELYAMAZING!!!