"Listening"

An interesting point of view from my single friend

Why do some guys always get the nicest girls..

Because they listen!!

This topic came up when we're talking about this guy who kept on getting models for girlfriends..

Even though he doesn't have the look for it..

So, a long girls talk came afterwards..

And the conclusion was..

He listens..

Girls talk

No need for advices..

No need for other opinions..

It's not that we don't listen to other thoughts..

But that's just the process we have to go through first..

We talk, and others..please listen!

Listening doesn't mean you can't talk to them..

Staying still there, and not talking at all is an insult as well..

Please talk along..

We'll discuss..

But don't cut in..

You'll be eaten alive..

Don't strongly disagree..

Show your sympathy..

Your concern..

Your support..

We're complicated, aren't we? Hahaha..

That's for us girls to be what we are..

And for them guys to figure us out..

Have fun trying it out..

Good Luck!

(My Definition of a) Best Friend

This is why I don't have what you so called a best friend..

I've got plenty of friends..

Close friends, if you wanna call it..

But there's no such thing as a best friend..

Well, maybe it's a matter of perception..

I always see it as you stand by your best friend no matter what..

And I could never do that..

I consider someone's a friend to you

If you have a mutual thing going on between you two..

When you tell them everything and your friend does the same thing in return..

All the deepest darkest secret,

All the things that you're proud of and All that you're ashamed of..

All your big moments and you're everyday 'it's nothing' stuffs..

In all the moments, the ups and the downs..

And everything in between..

Nothing to hide from..

No need to make excuses..

Because you're friends no matter what..

And as a friend

You be there..

You listen..

You don't judge..

You give your opinion, suggestion, advice, point of view..

Whatever is it..

Which is, your best one..

Which is, what you will do as if it's happening to you..

Be in their position..

And feel what they're feeling..

Because you do!

So, you tell them to face it..

Handle it the best way..

To do the right thing!

You do stand by them,

whenever they're right..

But when they're wrong..

You definitely don't do that..

you remind them,

Enlightened them,..

And they don't get defensive..

No hard feelings..

Because they know that you're doing is for their own good

So, feel happy for anyone who's got (my definition of a) best friend..

Stick by them..

You need each other in this world..

In good and bad..

More than you know..

My Moms

Wow..another Mother's Day..

My mother that I have known all my life is my mother now..Mama

My birth mother..Ibu,

passed away when I was 2,

and the fact of not remembering her at all,

still makes me feel guilty..

Still makes me feel sad..

How could I not remember at all?..

I realize, that I have all the blessing in the world to have Mama as my mom..

She's been there for me most of the way..

She's been all the mother that I could ask for..

But I just can't help not wondering about Ibu..

What would she say about the things that I've done?

Would she do the some thing?

What would she do differently?

What would I feel?

Would I feel differently?

For as long as I can remember,

I know for sure all the sacrifices that Mama has gone through for me..

And I appreciate and love her truly for that..

Still, I imagine what would Ibu do if she were in that situation..

Would I react differently looking at her sacrifices..

So everytime I go through something with Mama..

I would always think about Ibu..

In a way, both of them have been always with me..

And I would have always felt warm inside thinking that way..

Thank You Moms..

For being you..

And for being who you are for me..

May Allah bless Ibu's soul in heaven..

And may Allah bless Mama none the less..

Alhamdulillah..

Allah must love me that I've been blessed by having both of them as my moms..

Love you both..

In so many ways..

A Piece of My Paradise On Earth

I've been longing for a proper kitchen set for a very long..long..time

This is my next room in the house that's out of the renovating touch..

And the thing is I'm a moody person when it comes to cooking..

When I don't feel like it, I don't cook at all..

But most of the time, I love cooking...

I love cooking so much,

I'd stock them!

Because I kept on cooking..and cooking..and cooking..

I would cook for breakfast, lunch, dinner..

and everything in between..brunch, snacks, supper..

Up until there's no more room for any food left..

so stocking it up will do..

When I'm in that mood..

Now, that is when I really long for a nice place to accommodate my mood..

hahaha..

Well, I do just fine with my existing kitchen though..

My kids and friends love my cooking..

But, I bet I'd do much more better if I did it in a kitchen that I've been longing for..

The style would be as simple as possible though..

But still, it would be a simple me!

A hint of ethnic..

A dash of bling..

Sassy!!

Let's go through this one by one..

or well at least..let's imagine this one by one..

Ok, Dreaming begin..

First thing first..The Counter top!

Granite would be out of my league..

Synthetic granite...could be a dream, hope it would come true..

But I have my heart on Solid Wood!!

So material wise, it's a combination of Wood and Natural Stone!!

So, what goes more perfectly with wood and stone than

White and Flowy..

Perfectly Natural..

It's so Obvious what I want!

Balinese style..

Everything from there is down hill..

Let it flow..

I love the idea of placing the food on ethnically dishes..

Potteries, bamboo plates, stone bowls..

And how everything in the dish use the natural herbs or ingredients to garnish them..

Sereh, banana leaves,..

And all the completion of the design would make it Amazing..

Dimmed lightings would be wonderful..

Uuuu..and Candle lights are delightful..

Some touches of greens would definitely make a statement of Bali..

and it's not Bali if there's no kamboja flower tree..

So, I can pull some plants in potteries here and there..

Let's get totally Balinese crazy..

and make space for some..

Balinese umbrellas?..

somewhere..

hahaha..maybe just a miniature of them?

Well, or maybe just a painting of them...

A girl can dream..can they..

Dreaming of Morocco

I've been dying to decorate my bedroom

I've lived in about 6 different bedrooms since ive got married

my bedroom is never a part of the house that's

prioritized to be decorated

its the last thinkable thing to do..

But not have been decorating it,

didn't mean I didn't think about it..

More than that,

Being so long..

The concept kept on changing..

and I've been collecting

many ideas for it

So, first

it was simple sweet classic

And then

Came the Indian concept

After that,

I went through a very long pause

of getting tired thinking that it's not going to happen soon..

But these last weeks,

I've fallen in love with..

Moroccan style..

I love all the elements..

I love the colorful stained glass

on windows..

on lanterns..

I adore the colorful mozaic ceramic tiles that are all over the places

on buildings; walls, floors, ceilings..

on potteries..

on tables..

on everything..

Despite all the lovely materials that is used..

I heart all the ornaments that's common in Moroccan style..

..the low height tables

the lanterns..

the potteries..

the rugs..

the cushions..

the dishes..

No to deny that they are amazingly colorful..

they feel so comfortably down to earth.

And the best,

In my opinion would be..

The lanterns..

Beautiful!!!

The overall look and atmosphere is PASSIONATELYAMAZING!!!

Being Practical

I'm a very practical person.

The more I think about it, the more I know it's true..

The more I go through obstacles throughout my life, the more I know how practical I am..

And somehow, I ended up..

InsyaAllah,

Spending my whole life with my dear husband, who is very practical as well..

Our practicality just attracts one another, I guess

Hopefully, it means we're meant to be with each other...Amin

I've been dating him for 6 years before we got married..

Through those years, when most of people sometimes want their couple to be more romantic, more sensitive, and all..

I don't feel the need for that..

And he doesn't have a single romantic nor sensitive bone in his body..

And I'm good with that

I'm really comfortable with the way things have been going..

Still am.. and hope will always be..

Sometimes, I even get a bit annoyed when he does something merely romantic..

Now, after being married for more than 12 years..

The practicality really works well in the household..

He really get things done..

We do quite good in sharing errands, sharing on taking care of the kids, sharing on having our each own me time..

And the best thing is, most of the time, I don't have to say a single thing, or at least I don't have to say it to his face..

The most common thing that I'd do is..I mumble by myself about stuffs..

And he knows..he gets the hints..

But we ladies, have always have our sensitive moments, don't we

And it just gets me at the heart..

every time he does or says things..

That, maybe, he doesn't realize at all

That, maybe, he does them just for practicality sake..

But he just did or said the right thing at the right time..

And maybe for others it's nothing..

For me, knowing him as this practical person that he is, means a whole lot..

These are some of my favorites..

Going out with 4 kids, 11-7-5s..takes out all off the energy of my 36 years of mommy age..

I'd be exhausted every time I arrived home..

The minute we entered the house, he'd be taking all the kids upstairs to their room..

And leave me taking my time to relax by myself downstairs..

That means the world to me..

When my kids get sick.

Usually, I'll do all the taking care of them..

Which I don't mind at all..

But, every now and then I have the time between all those taking care off stuffs..

He'll just go over me, says nothing and gives me like a really serious massage from head to toe..

That feels heavenly..

When we go together out on a shopping purpose..

I don't get the time to go to places I really want to..

I've got 4 boys plus one..

So, boys places and shops are the places that we go to..

I really don't mind anyway..

I prefer to do my shopping by myself, alone..

when the kids are at school and my hubby is at the office.

I do it peacefully, without any rush from them..

But every now and then,

I notice he often disappears

Usually when the kids are taking a break at the end of our shopping time, eating donuts, having drinks, or others..

And he'll just show up, carrying a shopping bag, which can be anything..

A dress, shoes, a book,..anything..

And he really knows my taste, besides off his good taste on stuffs as well..

How nice is that..

And every now and then..

He just says the nicest thing..

One time, we were talking about every day stuffs..

Kids, house, friends, work..

We share opinions on everything..

we have good discussions..which means debating on stuff..

Which is fun..

So, one time, at the end of a discussion, I concluded..

Well, maybe it's just not meant to be then..Just accept it..

It was like one out of hundreds of our usual discussion..

But he commented,

How lucky I am to have a wife that's understanding..

Isn't that sweet..

The latest one was this..

It was the twins birthday party..

When it was quiz time, the MC threw a question to the guests..

How much does the twins mommy's weigh..

A very rude question, isn't it..

But every one was having fun with answering silly answers..

When it was time for me to give the right answer, I rejected to answer..

So, the MC went to my husband for the answer..

He answered a silly answer as well,

She only weighs 25 kgs, the rest is inner beauty..

If that's not the sweetest thing a husband can ever say..

Hahahaha..

Love you with all my heart..

Just the way you are..

The Twins on Kartini

Of all the heroine of Indonesia, she's the famous amongst all..

For one, she is the one who made a breakthrough for woman emancipation..

But, most of all, it's due to the things that we do on Kartini's Day..

On the 21st of April, every year

The school make their students to dress up in traditional costumes from all over this diverse country..

Which, for me, is nothing even near to the link of woman emancipation

Not festive enough,

they'll show it off by having a fashion show or fashion parade

Which, for me, I've always done it for my kids all the way..because, that's just the way I do stuffs..

For that reason, has caused 2 out of 4 of my boys have been collecting 3 trophies for those occasions..

That's another thing I feel bad for.. the fact that my boys winning trophies for Kartini's Day..

Isn't it supposed to be a woman thing..

Caused by that, for me, Kartini's Day has been just another costume party

So, it was a huge surprise for me

When the twins got back from kindergarten, on our way home..in the car..

They passionately talked about Kartini:

Bu, did you know..

Back then, the time when Ibu Kartini lived..

Girls are not allowed to go to school..

They're not allowed to go to work either..

Only boys are allowed to do those things..

Girls have to stay home, and take care of the children, the daddy, the house..

They're just allowed to sew, to cook, and other house's stuffs

Catching the moment,

I jumped right away..

Yes, and now because of Ibu Kartini's effort,

girls have the same chance to be as good as boys, even better..

Girls now can go to schools as high as they want to..

Girls now can work at any positions, as anything as they will..

Girls can be doctors, dentist, architects, teachers..like me..

Maybe, lost of interest..

Or tired of school..

But surely, it was one of those smart stuffs that they like to come up with..

and definitely, it's one of those sweet things that they like to think off..

They immediately cut me off..

Bu..imagine, if we lived at the same time when Ibu Kartini lived..

Ibu, you don't have to go to work..

You can stay home the whole day with us..

That'll be cool..

Wow, Dear God..

Maybe for some people, feeling as deep as I felt is such a drama Queen thing

But for me..

I paused, took a good look at them..

my eyes started to get wet, hugged and kissed them..

Love you boys, with all my heart..