Fasting Boys..

Alhamdulillah,
It's Ramadhan again..

Since I've got children..
It's been a different story
when it comes to Ramadhan..
It's been more colorful..

If you don't know yet..I've got 4 kids
Every time I'm pregnant and nursering
I don't fast..
yet, still I prepare for sahur and breaking time

When they were toddlers..
either they want to join sahur and breaking time
or they're cranky because of the lack of attention..

Since they're big enough to join fasting..
It's about what they want to eat..
It's about waking them up at sahur..
It's about controlling their emotion and patience..

But, InsyaAllah..
Everything that's a must for the kids..
At the first times, Introducing it, I'll try to show the fun part of it..
Like praying..
They love; the getting the wudhu part, the wearing the sarong part, and the doing it together part..
lol..
Alhamdulillah..

The same thing,
with fasting in Ramadhan..

All 4 boys, since they were around 3 years old,
really enjoy the fact that they can wake up in the middle of the night for sahur..

And breaking the fast at Maghrib is a fest for them..
From picking and giving ideas what to break with,
To helping the preparation in the kitchen before maghrib,
Until eating together at the table when it's maghrib time..

The encouragement they get from school
is also an important factor..
They're very proud,
if they could fast the whole day and pray 5 times..

Oh! Don't forget this one..
The promises that their grandparents give them
How much money they'll get if they fast for the whole day and if it's for the whole month..

Although, until now
only kakak and ade, Rizqi and Raihan, who are fasting..
The twins just love the idea of fasting..
They always ask someone near them, either me, their dad, their brother, or the helpers - their mbas
to say the prayer for breaking the fast whenever they wanted to eat or drink..lol
And the prayer for starting the fast again whenever they finished eating or drinking..lol
The most important thing is the thought ya babies!!

Rizqi is now in the 5th grade..
And, Alhamdulillah, he's been fasting for the whole day since 1st grade..
Before that, in Kindergarten, he tried to do it half day..
That's My 'Kakak'!
The same with Raihan..
Raihan is now in the 2nd grade
So, Alhamdulillah, last year was the first time he fasted for the whole day..
And he got the whole month..minus one day because he was sick..
Good Job De'!

The sad thing for me is..
I've been working from 2 in the afternoon to 7 at night for almost 2 years now..
So, I've missed the fasting moments in my family last year..
And I'm going to miss it for the second time this year..
*sigh..*

Missed every chaotic part of it..lol..
The pouring the es campur ingredients into each glasses..
The making of shaved ice..
The preparing of plates, bowls, glasses, spoon and forks for everybody..
The preparing of the food and drinks..
to The arranging who sits where, due to the small dining table that we have..

To make it worse..
I don't have to do anything at the office during the breaking time..
which we are still in the classroom, teaching, at that time..
So, it's all prepared by the OB

to the..
praying maghrib together with the whole family part..
*sigh..*

So, what I do now is..
I push all the preparation that's possible before I go to work..
Which is not as much fun..
And is not as effective..
And..
Unwillingly..
Enviously..
Halfheartedly..
Feeling Guiltily..
Leave it to the mbas to finish up during maghrib..
*sigh..*

Still trying hard to take it easy..
Being openhearted..
and..
every now and then..
if it's possible..
ask for permission to skip my 5 o'clock class..
Just for not missing the fasting moments with my family..
*lol..sigh..*

Happy Fasting Everyone!!
Allah Bless Us!!

Can You Keep a Secret?

Last night,
Out of the blue,
a friend of mine,
told her story,
ask for some advice,
and make me promise..
not to tell anyone.

Actually,
This wasn't the first time
someone did it..

I don't know why,
But I always feel flattered
Whenever someone trust me
with their stories..

For the one who knows me,
I'm this loud person..
Talks loud, laughs loud,..
And if I'm in the position
of someone that wants to tell a story..
I'll be the last person that I'll pick!
lol..
Don't you just think that
I'm going to blab it to everyone
with my big mouth
the first time I get the chance to?
lol..

But, maybe..
Because I think that way,
It makes me aware..
Makes me cautious..
for keeping the secret,
for listening to their stories,
for knowing when, what, and how to talk and give advice..
for remaining their trust in me..

It's been happening for sometime now..
So I think it's not a glitch.
It started in Junior High..
Reached its peak in High School..
Some in College..
and now at work.

I always ask the ones who share their stories,
the reasons why they're telling me..
Just to know,
how I have to react..

And their reasons vary..

Is it my patience?
Because I consider myself impatient..
Is it my willing to listen?
Because, as you can see, I'm loud..
Is it because I don't judge people?
Because, sometimes, I do analyze them, what and why they do things..
Is it my good advice?
Because, actually my advices basically are all just logic..

Maybe..
It's because of my way of living..
I'm a very relax person..
Most of the time, I can accept,
what happens around me..
Most of the time, I consider,
that people always try to do
what they think is right..
their best at that time, in that situation..
So, most of the time, I try to understand,
and most of the time, I believe,
that everything happens for a reason..

Maybe..
It's because of my compassion..
Most of the time, I want to do something..
If my friends are in trouble..
Sometimes maybe what I do is nothing for some people..
or it's just small stuffs for others..
But I do it with all my heart..
No strings attached..
I always try to give my best..

Most of the time, I get emotionally involve..
when my friends go through something..
Even though sometimes,
the case seemed so bizarre..
or the case sounded so stupid..
I always try to give my all..
Because I know its important for them.

Hopefully, after talking to me..
They'll find a way to solve their problems..
They'll see with another perspectives on seeing at their problems..
They'll release their anger, their sadness, their frustration..

Or at least..
They'll feel that they have a friend..
Someone that they can rely on..
Someone that they can depend on..
Someone trustworthy..
Someone who cares..
A shoulder to cry on..

So, just spill it out guys!
I'm all ears..

Deal or No Deal..

When Rizqi was still our only child..
and the only grandchild..
from both my parents and my hubby's.
Just imagine how spoiled he was!!

Everyone bought him gifts..
clothes, books, toys..
everything that he wants!!

That's maybe why,
my second child, Raihan,
was happy enough just playing with Rizqi's toys.
Because my house was loaded
with the best and latest toys there were..
But still, every now and then..
he also wanted to buy new ones..
And when he did, Rizqi also had to buy one.





So, I started to apply this..
Maybe you mommies already know about this..
The reward and punishment technique..

First,
I set the rules, example..
Waking up in the morning,
without crying and whining
or
Eats breakfast, lunch and dinner,
by themselves
finish up before half an hour,
without crying and whining..
and so on
Through out the day
from they wake up in the morning
until they go to sleep at night.

Then,
Every time they can fulfill one rule,
they'll get one sticker.

And then, there are helping bonuses..
So, if I wanted some help..
All I have to do is..
Just ask them in return for some amount of stickers..
lol
And, there are manners bonuses..
So, if they said thank you and please, behaved nicely,..
I'll give them a small sticker.
But, if they got into a tantrum or hit, kick or say bad words..
I'll remove one of their stickers.

Finally,
At the end of the week
we'll count their stickers..
If they had reached 50 stickers..
I predicted it will take them a week or so to collect..
They can exchange them with a book or a toy with the price under 20 thousand rupiahs..

Or they could continue,
collecting them until 200 stickers..
Which I predicted will take them a month or so to collect..
They can exchange them with a toy with the price under 100 thousand rupiahs..

Sounds complicated?
But it was running like a charm..
Until it got to a time..
when they were very good..
obey all the rules..
aim all the bonuses..
So, sometimes, I'll run out of stickers..
Or to be worse..
I'll run out of money to buy the books or the toys..
LOL..
So, I ended up owing my children..*sigh..lol*

So, I stopped
Because they started to don't care..
whether they'll get stickers or not..
And they're not into toys anymore anyway..

The oldest 2, Rizqi and Raihan are big enough, to behave, the be responsible, and most of all..to understand..


Now,
I'm getting trouble with the two younger ones, the twins, Tama and Dika..
Going to the mall with them is a suicidal attempt..lol
They'll whine and nag all the way..
from the time we get there..
'till the time we leave.

From wanting to buy toys..
"Ok, a small one ya babe.."
"Nooo..I want the big one!!"
*which they already have a similar one! Only a slight difference with the series before..but yet the price is totally different!!*
Ignored..

Walk a bit further..
Wanting to buy candies..
"Ok, this one ya babe..and share.."
"Nooo..I want the one with the toy on top!!"
*which the candies don't even taste good, the toy will easily break..but yet it cost ridiculously!!*
Ignored..

To something that you won't even think of..
Wanting to cut their hair..
"Ok, we'll go to your usual barbershop ya babe.."
"Nooo..I want to go now..here in the mall!!"
*really babe, are you kidding me? Your hair is still neat..and the price they put for a simple trim is a nightmare!!*
Ignored..

When you thought there's nothing else that they possibly want..
Surprisingly, they do..
Wanting to buy clothes..
"Ok, this t-shirt is nice.."
"Nooo..I want that bandanna!!"
*which is a 400 thousand rupiahs bandanna, that he didn't even need..and OMG, the price for a piece of cloth!!..and off course, the one that I offered him was the ones on discount..lol*
Ignored..

It will go on and on..
and on..
So, a trip to the mall..
is sure one struggling trip!

Haven't found a way yet..
that can be adapted for all 4 of them..
that can use the same standards..
that won't make them envy one another..
For now..
Just try to avoid malls..
as frequent as possible..
Especially when we only..
have just the enough money..no extra..

Well, actually, its not only at the mall..
It's everywhere..
Constantly..
It's a good test for your patience though..
It's also good for testing your consistency..
and to test how smarter you are than them to give reasons not to, to argue with them..
Trying as hard as I could..
not to give up to them..
not to give in..
lol..
But sometimes..
When they're super nice..
and I've got the extra money to spend..
Or maybe just don't have the energy..
and the heart..
to say NO!
or just to argue..
Ok, that's it!

Eventually,
It's up to us how to compensate the budget from something else..
Hopefully we won't get over budget !!
But if we do, when most often we do, we'll manage..we'll deal with it..

Aren't we mommies, fairies or what?..^_^
And all your wish will come true..
Triing!!..

The Famous Lasagna Story..

My Grandma
loved to cook..
And she wasn't your usual grandma..
She's not the one with the old time recipes kind..
Mine always came up with new recipes..

If she went out to a restaurant..
And tasted something good..
She'd make it the next day..
and it tasted even better..
That's how she loved cooking..

I was a huge fan of her cooking..
Like all of her other families and friends..
Got lots of favorite dishes of hers..
And she loved to share
her recipes with the ones who likes to cook..
I've been using lots of her recipes..
since I had the need to throw a party and cook..lol
Love you eyang ti..

My mom
is the best cook ever..
So good, she doesn't use a recipe..
She just use her feeling..
And her feeling is so deliciously good..
You can ask her for her recipe..
But, don't even try to bet
that your cooking, which is based on her recipe..
will taste like hers..
Not a chance..

So, if you really want to know the ingredients..
You'd better follow her to the kitchen..
and see with your own eyes..
How she cooks..
and what does she put in her cooking..
From the beginning till the end..
Don't blink..lol

or..
I've got my own ways..
It's much much much easier..
I ask my mom's maid to take notes..
So then.. I'll get her recipe..
Lol..
Love you mama..

The famous lasagna of mine..
is a combination of my grandma's recipe and my mom's

My grandma learned how to make lasagna..
She gave me the recipe..
But I felt something's missing..

My mom makes the most outstandingly delicious macaroni schotel..
So delicious, she makes it so often..
I got the hang of it..

Then I was thinking..
What if..

The next thing..
Voila!!
My famous lasagna..
SERIOUSLY DELICIOUS..
OUTSTANDINGLY YUMMY..
SUPERBLY MOUTHWATERING..
FANTASTICALLY TASTY..
*lol..modest me..*

It's been my thing ever since..
Family gatherings, birthdays, arisan,..
I even make money from it..
My son's school, friends,..

Alhamdulillah..
For grandmas and mommies..
Don't you love them so much..
They're the best..ever!!
Hugs and kisses...

My Dear Dad

I'm sharing my stories
about daddies..
How they love us so..
They have their own way
to show us..
How they love us..

Sometimes I think,
It's got something to do
with his background..

My Dad has got 4 brothers..
and then..he's got a son and 3 daughters..

My Dad came from a struggling family..
and..he's been trying his best
to fulfill all needs of his 4 children

My Dad worked in the government..
with all the bureaucratization..
and..he had to deal with 4 children
with 3 - 5 age differences..
who became teenagers almost at the same time..

There would be always
something wrong
with what we did..
he always made us think..
we're not fulfilling his standard

If we did something wrong..
he always thinks..
that that was our way..
to offend him..

No friends of ours..
are polite enough.
No boyfriends of ours..
are good enough.

When I was younger..
I got emotional..
Cried..
and felt running away from home..
every time it happened..

When I get older..
I still get a bit emotional..
But then I turned ignorant..

Now,
He's still the same dad..
I appreciate his believes..
I respect his decisions..
I understand his reactions..
He loves us..

Love you too, dad!